12:40 AM

Pick Up Lines IV

These are a few "Christian" pick up lines. I would love to know if any of them *EVER* have worked...

22. When God made you, He was showing off. [Seriously? Any girl worth her weight in Calvin's Institutes volumes is going to think this line is ridiculously obvious. The same could be said of pine trees or lice.]

23. Do you need help carrying that heavy Bible? [Brilliant.]

24. You don't have an accountability partner? Me neither. [Who is this dumb? WHO??]

25. Would you happen to know a Christian woman that I could love with all my heart and wait on hand and foot? [Wait, remind me why you're asking for a recommendation from a PERFECT STRANGER?]

26. Excuse me, I believe one of your ribs belongs to me. [WHAT?? What does that even MEAN? Wouldn't it be a more biblically accurate allusion to say, "Excuse me, I believe you were made from one of my ribs..."? But who would say that? Geez, this one is just awful.

Ok, now for some that deserve a little credit for being clever. [Note: this is NOT the equivalent of a recommendation of usage.]

27. You're so beautiful you made me forget my standard pick up line. [Downside of this sucker is that it sounds like you go around picking up chicks all the time. Then again, maybe you do.]

28. Your good looks don't intimidate me. [If you have to use a pick up line, this one is a good option for several reasons. First, you get the "you're beautiful" out of the way. Second, you establish yourself to be strong and confident. Third, you establish that you have enough bravado to whip out a line like this and enough humor to at least capture her interest. Unless you fall flat on your face.]

29. I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your Booty! Arrrrrrrrrr... [Ok, so this isn't exactly wittiness at its finest, but it's HILARIOUS.]

30. Excuse me, but I DO believe it's time we met. [Simple, direct, and to the point. I actually do endorse the use of this one and variations on the theme, depending on personality. Simple, direct, and to the point is a recipe for greatness in dealing with women - you might strike out alot, but you're striking out because she's not the right girl, not because you're being retarded.]


Micah said...

You've gotta stop this. I'm getting too many bad ideas.