1:28 AM

of the last, say, 30 times songs have gotten stuck in my head...

probably 25 times it's been this commercial or this one.

that's some good marketing.

now instead of looking fly and rolling phat
my legs are sticking to the vinyl
and my posse's getting laughed at
F-R-E-E that spells free
credit report dot com baby

8:04 PM

The Bug

the bug turns 16 in july, and while he will be driving mom's old suburban for a while, his goal is to get an audi a-4. he is seriously in love with this car. so much so, that dad said tonight at dinner, "i'm afraid, when kj sees a real a-4, like one he can sit in, he'll lick it or something."

11:13 PM

Memorial Day

last night at 11:30, a dear friend went to be with the Lord Jesus. clem mueller, a beloved member of our church here in dallas, a man of great character and wisdom, family practice physician, father of eight (his eldest daughter mentored me through high school), grandfather of 6 (including one in-utero), and best-friend and husband of one woman for almost 34 years, will be sorely missed. he went to be with the Lord after a hard fight with pancreatic cancer.

praise our gracious God, dr. mueller is now more alive than we are.

12:50 AM

Top Ten Books I Was Surprised to Love

these books are books i read for class or fun, books i really didn't know that i would be sucked into, would fall in love with, would lose myself in, would even in some cases be changed by. so here you go. i'm not really sure why the list is ordered this way, but it made sense.

10. love, rosie - a modern epistolary novel, this fluffy piece of chick lit is the traditional story of love derailed by circumstances... and eventually remedied, through no disloyalty of the main characters. a little bit like jane eyre in its heart.
9. running with scissors - ok, so skip the sex scenes - it's quite easy to see them coming - and this book is hilarious, shocking, tragic, fascinating, and brilliant. dry, a memoir about overcoming alcoholism, was much better, but by then i was hooked on augusten burroughs, so it came as no surprise.
8. the lord of the flies - really quite excellent book about sin nature run amock. think LOST but with little boys, and no enemies but each other.
7. the constant princess - this very compassionate reading of katherine of aragon captivated me. i love how philippa gregory tends to root what she writes in history, and this book did a great job of explaining the facts in a way that really made you rethink the whole story, because it's possible that katherine's story really did unfold this way.
6. the opposite of fate - this memoir by amy tan really brought out my inner-writer. having read most of tan's work, it was really interesting to learn about her personal life and her relationship with her remarkable mother, who has clearly shaped quite a bit about her books. i loved it.
5. the historian - this is a novel about dracula. i mean, what are the odds that i would go for that? to make matters more unlikely, it's by a dracula expert - and over 650 pages. boy was i surprised. it was AWESOME.
4. the thirteenth tale - ok, so there's some weird twin psychology, but never have i been so shocked by a book's ending. the twist caused my jaw to hit the floor - for two days at least, my mouth hung open most of the time after i finished the book. it's a traditional gothic novel, but with a unique structure. ok, maybe not unique, but structurally very woman in white while being more in the spirit of wuthering heights. an absolute blast.
3. mama day - i used to wonder what married people fought about. now i know. that sounds awful, but it's really wonderful. kinda like this book. yay for sacrificial love being chosen by selfish people.
2. the harry potter series - i read the first book when i was working at barnes & noble in the kids' section, largely to see it for myself and make up my mind about recommending it or not, but also to see what the hype is about. i guess it really took until the next february for me to really get hooked (book 3 did it for me, and right after my car accident, you might remember), and i loved them so much i went to one of those crazy book release parties last summer. so that's pretty surprising.
1. the time traveler's wife - this book was remarkably good. i cried like a baby. there were a few r-rated scenes, so read with caution, but it's powerful, beautiful, and good - changed the way i think of myself as a single woman who hopes to get married, as a part of the church that the Lord Jesus died for and is coming back for, and as a person who loves novels. they are really powerful things.

in other news, i am reading wendy shalit's latest - girls gone mild: young women reclaim self-respect and find it's not be to be good, which will be released in paperback this summer under the title the good girls' revolution: young rebels with self-esteem and high standards. it is FABULOUS. anyone who knows women or girls should read it. i'm serious.

10:52 PM

Two Lists for Book Lovers

i love books. i read voraciously, to an almost sickening degree (strike the almost if you're my sister). so i have decided to compile a couple of lists about books. tomorrow i'll post a more positive list.

the first list is of books i hate. in order for me to hate a book, something serious has to have happened. i mean, we aren't talking mere about disliking or being disturbed. i rarely really hate books. it makes them special. these are listed in terms of how virulent my hatred is, not the books' own merits. incidentally, several of these i haven't finished because i got worked up too quickly and strongly.

Top Ten Books I Hate
10. hatchet - i was highly disturbed by the ruminations of a preteen on suicide. couldn't handle it.
9. the emperor's children - just not that interesting. just enough literary proficiency to make me read the whole thing, just enough sin and disordered relationships to frustrate the heck out of me, just enough of a waste to make me like "grr" about the whole thing. especially since it was supposed to be the greatest novel of the new century according to somebody i will no longer be listening to.... if i can remember who it was.
8. the awakening - i hate to break it to you feminists who believe it, but freedom is not about escaping the responsibilities of family. it's not about escaping responsibilities period. the selfishness - claiming to speak for women - of this book really ticked me off.
7. choosing God's best - who wants to be patronized, talked down to, and lectured on romantic relationships with questionable theology? this is your book.
6. the camel club - i would hope that there would be SOME level of literary prowess in an author who has consistently made the NYT bestseller list.... but this book suggests otherwise. it's painful - full of sentences like, "not only was macon surprised to see his mother, but the sky was full of dark clouds." i made that one up, but it reflects a common sentence structure baldacci loves to use. and the plot sucks, too.
5. lipstick jungle - started reading it. stopped after page like 12 and threw it in the trash - too much sex. in the first 12 pages. not a good sign.
4. the master and margarita - this book is probably not at fault, but i read it for a class in college which was taught by a professor who totally creeped us out, especially regarding this book (jokes about the magic lotion - or "goddess cream" - that makes you gorgeous and enables you to fly were REALLY over the top). this is a case of guilt by association.
3. corregidora - the obsession of this book with the ugliness of the protagonists' genealogical heritage - a grandfather (and also great-grandfather - same guy) who was a slave-owning monster is overwhelmingly grotesque. the sexual violence, the serious dysfunction were really disturbing. and there really is no hope, because there is no exit from the cycle of dysfunction.
2. codex - the entire time i was reading this book, i was thinking "this is just completely ridiculous." i kept thinking there had to be more going on - there had to be more going on, but there wasn't. the secret of this codex was in some easter egg in a video game. and the darkness of the narrative form, which is something i generally enjoy, was weird. i actually threw the book when i finished it.
1. lolita - that same class from #4 required this book. 60 pages was enough for me - i begged off on moral reasons (and was told to read this fabulous other book, called we). nabokov is undoubtedly a genius, and lolita is undoubtedly a very important book. but sometimes i think burying your head in the sand is ok, and i for one don't need detailed descriptions of pedophilia floating around in my head.

12:39 AM

Sometimes She's Crazy...

...but sometimes she's dead on.

this is one of those times.

long live ann coulter!

11:57 PM

Barlow Girl - On My Own

can't believe that i'm here in this place again
how did i manage to mess up one more time?
this pattern seems to be the story of my life
should have learned this lesson by the thousandth time

cause i promised myself i wouldn't fall
and here i've fallen
i guess i'm not as strong as i thought
all i can do
is cry to You

oh, God, You have to save me
You're my last and only hope
all my right answers fail me
i can't seem to make it on my own

always thought that i could be strong enough
what made all of them fall couldn't take me down
why did i think that i was above it all?
i have learned that pride comes before the fall

i can't promise myself that i won't fall
cause here i've fallen
i know i'm not as strong as i thought
all i can do
is cry to You

oh, God, You have to save me
You're my last and only hope
all my right answers fail me
i can't seem to make it on my own


yeah. that would be me.

6:39 PM

Shut Up and Drive

i will be doing quite a bit of the second (and we all know i'm probably incapable of the first) for the next couple of days. mom is here to take me back to dallas, so it's ROADTRIP TIME! in all likelihood, she will be doing an inordinate amount of driving, as i'm due for some bad days. but i'm glad i'm going out on a high note, at least.

my stomach hurts.

see you in texas!

11:49 PM

Background on the Westminster Assembly

this article is fantastic and to the point.

"I want to close with a story to illustrate the practical value of knowing Presbyterian doctrine. The story comes from B. B. Warfield (1851-1921), the great Princeton theologian. It concerns a Christian man who traveled West during the days of the pioneers. One day he found himself in the middle of a gunfight in a wild western town. The whole town was in an uproar, but he saw one man who - despite all the commotion - remained calm, cool, and collected. The traveler was so amazed that he said to himself, 'Now there is a man who knows his theology.' At this he walked up to him and asked the first question of the Shorter Catechism, 'What is the chief end of man?' The man answered correctly, 'Man's chief end is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever.' On the basis of Warfield's story, I commend to you the Westminster Catechisms and Confession of Faith as a theology suitable for every situation in life."

8:02 PM

Top Ten Actresses I Might Watch a Movie For

you know what i mean - there are actresses and actors you like enough to seriously consider seeing anything they're in... not that i don't have my limits (slasher films/horror/tons of skin) - i don't see all their films, but i'm more likely to. here are my top 10 such chicks, living and dead. the reasons differ from woman to woman - sometimes it's more about the performance; other times it's more about what kind of films they choose to do.

10. anne hathaway
9. kate hudson
8. gwyneth paltrow
7. michelle pfieffer
6. cate blanchett
5. angelina jolie
4. reese witherspoon
3. audrey hepburn
2. grace kelly
1. jennifer garner

who are some of yours?

10:32 PM

Wisdom for the Day

[i didn't say this; it's practically a direct quote from a friend in my life group.]

"my kids ask for the world because they know they are loved. we will ask God for huge things if we really know He loves us."

i needed to hear that tonight. badly.

10:03 PM

I just had to laugh...

see more politics and fun!

9:51 PM

Great Cheesy Lines

don't you love them? the best one i've heard in the last 24 hours goes to "if you want to live, don't leave my side." oh val kilmer. you kill me.

1:21 AM

Fact of the Day

this is an excellent episode of law and order svu.

9:58 PM

Top Ten Television Shows Currently in Production

i noticed camille paglia has top ten lists (top ten works of art, top ten sculptures, top ten movie lines, etc.), and they are cool, so i thought i would start doing the same on occasion. of course, i'm not nearly as brilliant as camille paglia, but i'm also not as wrong as her on a number of thing that matter (like theology), and that has to count for something.

10. the Office. it takes some getting used to the humor if it isn't quite your style, but it's fun to quote with friends any time.

9. CSI. yay for the forensics! seriously, though, i way prefer the original to either of the spinoffs.

8. Law & Order. i love how relevant a lot of the cases are, and how generally evenhanded they are (maybe excepting religion).

7. Ugly Betty. fashion, humor, awkward romance, ridiculous drama, and some salt-of-the-earth characters. what more could you ask for?

6. Law & Order: SVU. the on-screen chemistry between Detectives Stabler and Benson is fantastic, the cases are raw, and the law is fascinating. i love it.

5. Bones. i watch this gem after the latest season comes out, episode after episode. i can't handle waiting between episodes. the chemistry between Bones and Booth is palpable, and it's physical, emotional, professional, personal - almost every level is electrifying. i love it. and the forensic science is SO interesting. i'm sure a good bit of it is totally unrealistic, but it's fantastic.

4. House, MD. i love house because he says and does things that no one could get away with really. it's like a fairy tale for sarcastic people.

3. How I Met Your Mother. LEGEN-wait for it-DARY. hilarious. not exactly the most moral of these shows, but it probably has the best dialogue-writers of any of them. and the concept is great - a father telling his children in 20+ years how he met their mother - and how he became the man he was when he met her. brilliant. the cast is great, and they are FUNNY.

2. Heroes. everyday superheroes. epic battle between good and evil. surprises at every turn. need i say more?

1. LOST. ok, so i definitely am attached to this show partly because it's a JJ Abrams brainchild, and so was Alias, which is only the best television show in history. the twists, the backstory, the reveals, the drama, the weirdness of it all - i love it.

10:44 PM

John Owen

my paper was called "Will the Real John Owen Please Stand Up? A Preparation to Read Owen's Works." if you really want to read the whole thing, which is like 13 pages long, let me know and i'll email it to you. in the meantime, i'll give you a few snippets you may not have known about the great puritan theologian.

fact #1) owen was married twice, first to mary for 31 years, then a year and a half after she died, to dorothy (who was widowed as well) for 8.

fact #2) mary bore john 11 children. only one of them survived to adulthood, and she too died before owen. that's an average of one child dying every three years throughout his adulthood.

fact #3) neither of his wives and none of his children are mentioned in any of his published works, and as far as i could find out, they aren't mentioned in any of his surviving letters. in fact, the only family member he does mention is his father, and only in a sentence.

fact #4) owen was a calvinist before he was a christian.

fact #5) owen was, in turn, a country preacher, a tutor, a private family chaplain, a military chaplain, dean and then vice chancellor at oxford college christ church, where he was responsible for the worship services, and a city pastor. and the whole time he was writing book after book. he also regularly preached before parliament, and his favorite sermon topic on these occasions was religious tolerance within orthodoxy.

fact #6) owen was tight with oliver cromwell.

fact #7) owen drives biographers and historians crazy because of the paucity of info on him.

8:03 PM

Home Again, Home Again, Giggity Gig

so i'm headed back to dallas for the summer to be tested and studied and do physical therapy and all the funness of diagnostic medicine. i'm glad to be able to be home with my family - and be taken care of on bad days. :)

last night i had a sleep study done. it was not fun. i don't like those. hopefully they got what they needed and i never have to do that again.

i finished my paper on john owen. tomorrow i will post some stuff about him, but i will warn you - we know very little about him, oddly enough.

10:02 PM

2001: A Space Odyssey

is stupid.

and the disc didn't work long enough for me to change my mind.

on the upside, bacardi frozen daquiri mixes are awesomely easy.